1. If you know me in real life. Now don’t get me wrong, there are certain people in real life who I don’t actually mind following, but for me, Twitter is a place where I take enjoyment in reading about the life of people I don’t know or the people I do know and find interesting. A lot of the people I do know just aren’t interesting.

2. Lots of @s. There’s no problem with conversations on Twitter but some people just go O.T.T.! I like to read funny stuff, profound stuff, etc. If you just use Twitter as a conversational tool then I don’t even think you should be on it. There’s MSN. Which nicely takes me on to my next ‘irk’…

3. Frequent RT abusers. You bastards, you are the bane of my twife! Stop RTing your F’ing conversations, WE DON’T CARE! @twitter created a wonderful thing where when you tweet, it says ‘in reply to’ so that if we actually care about your conversation, we can click that and go back to the tweet which it was in reference to, rather than see my timeline bastardised by such.

4. People who do not reply. You are not a celebrity. And F it, even if you are, there are very few celebrities I will take this bollocks from! If you tweet frequently, then I expect an @ back if I tweet you. Got me? …….I’m glad that is clear.

5. Not following me. This is slightly hypocritical; for every person I follow, about 4 people follow me. But basically if I follow you then, well, to be honest I think it’s an honour. What pisses me off even more about this is if you regularly @ me back – so why the heck aren’t you following me?! Once again, celebrities are exempt from this rule.

6. You tweet shit. Self-explanatory. And if its not, then give me your name on Twitter and I’ll make sure I’m not following you.

7. You have no personality. If you have no persona, something distinct about you that makes me want to follow you then I will unfollow. Boring sods.

Thank You.

E.T. (Expressionable Thought)

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